People often have questions about which pronouns to use with transgender and gender nonconforming people. Explain that a transgender person who presents herself as a woman should be referred to with female pronouns. Similarly, a transgender person who presents himself as a man should be referred to with male pronouns. If they are unsure of someone’s gender, they should respectfully ask his or her name and what pronoun he or she prefers they use.

Look at the continuum. People generally understand gender and sexual orientation as consisting of discrete categories—male or female, gay, bisexual or straight—and that most people feel as though they fit into one of those “boxes.”

For many people, their identities line up along the left or right side of this chart. Look at the left side of the chart. Many people are assigned male at birth (sex), feel like a man inside (gender identity), dress and act in a masculine way (gender expression) and are attracted to women (sexual orientation) on the right bottom. Now look at the right side of the chart. Many people assigned female at birth (sex) feel like a woman inside (gender identity), dress and act in a feminine way (gender expression) and are attracted to men (sexual orientation) on the left bottom. 

For some people, their identities line up in a different way. If you are transgender, you may be assigned female at birth (sex) but feel male inside (gender identity), dress and act in a masculine way (gender expression) and are attracted to women (sexual orientation). 

Some people don’t feel that they fit in either “box,” but somewhere in the middle or outside the continuum. For example, some people feel neither male nor female, express themselves in both masculine and feminine ways, or feel attracted to both sexes. In addition, about 1.7% of the population is born intersex, with both male and female biological characteristics. These aspects of our identity are complex and can be confusing.